Friday, October 28, 2005

What These Yankees Don't Tell You

A very old and dear friend stayed with me this week on his way to a move from Texas to Pennsylvania. Having spent most of his life in the Texas-Oklahoma area (although he's quite well traveled), we were discussing real differences between the two parts of the country. Here were the top five things to know when you move from Texas up here with all these Yankees (as my family would say):

1) No matter what they tell you, White Castle is no substitute for what you're giving up: Taco Bueno and Sonic. Here, they have one Sonic per 100 square miles. And no Taco Bueno. White Castle? It's good, but only once a year when you're drunk.

2) Newness. In Dallas, everything is very new, especially in the areas with the hottest restaurants, condos, nightlife and shops. In the southwest there's land, and lots of it, and everything is very big, new, and upscale! Up here, everything is old. Rehabbed old buildings are great -- they have their charm -- but when I go to Dallas, I have to wear sunglasses. Everything is so shiny!

3) It's cold. Your first winter won't necessarily be your hardest. But it's cold -- earlier, later, and longer. No more 70s in January. On the upside? Not as many tornados. Number 3(a)? When you go to the grocery store and the bread and milk are out, that means a storm is coming.

4) You have to wash your car more in the winter. And get that special undercarriage option. The gunk they put on the roads here (in Indiana, it's a mixture of salt, sand, and molasses) is *nasty*. And you'll learn to L-O-V-E your antilock breaks.

5) Nothing against the people up here, but they're not as friendly, or at least, not in the same way. A southern friend of ours sums it up well. She says it's not that Northerners aren't friendly when you get to know them, it's that they're not helpful. Her tactic when she gets frustrated at "not helpful" Yankees? "I just speak even more slowly. It's makes them crazy."


At Fri Oct 28, 08:25:00 PM, Blogger Erudite Redneck said...

Right on. I've spent my whole life in Oklahoma, Arkansas and Texas, but am fairly well-traveled. And I do b'lieve this nails it. :-)

Come see, and praise, my critters!!!! ;-)


At Fri Oct 28, 08:52:00 PM, Anonymous braingirl said...

Yup -- it's the lack of Taco Bueno that was the hardest for me in the early days. (And those are darned nice critters you got there.)

At Wed Nov 02, 04:42:00 PM, Blogger Toad734 said...

Ya but how friendly is some hillbilly in Arkansas going to be when I show up with a 2005 car, chuck taylors and a Chicago accent and don't I know who Tony Stewart is?


Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link

<< Home